Wednesday, July 23, 2008

On the news!

Here's what we do all day.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Something Special About Me

Funny things kids wrote for this question today:

"I want a rabbits."

"I have freckles." (I had to tell her the name in English. When I told her that in Canada they think freckles are very cute she burst into giggles and covered her face in embarrassment.)

"I have eyelids." (Several girls wanted to know the name for the second eyelid fold possessed by only some Koreans. It is so desirable here that some people here actually get surgery to achieve it. I think it's more common among Caucasians, but I'm not sure.)

"I am ambidextrous." (I had to give her the word for this.)

"I have acne." (She didn't really have pink pimples or anything, but her skin wasn't totally smooth on her forehead, so that was the best word I could give her.)

Monday, June 30, 2008

Il Dan

I have been asked to take my black belt test!

My Gwangjang-nim has asked me to take part in the Korea-wide black belt test in August. It would be in a city a couple hours away, and with probably several dozen other test-takers.

The sad news is that the test takes place five days after we leave Korea. There will also be a test in July, but it's in two weeks - which probably won't be enough time to prepare.

We ended our slow-going Korean-English conversation with the understanding that even if I can't test for my black belt, I will know that I've earned it. I'm actually really flattered that he thinks I'm ready to take the test. I know I've improved a lot, and learned a lot over the past year, but it's still nice to have it validated.

I might just have to look into continuing taekwondo in DC.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Rainy Season

My co-teacher is currently scooping water seeping up through the floor with a dustpan and tossing it out the window.

Our windows were all fogged up this morning and dry clothes had become damp and wet clothes were not yet dry. Even though it rains outside, the moisture and humidity are so thick that they join us inside.

Mold is a worry.

It is worth mentioning that up until now we have had some of the most beautiful spring weather I have ever experienced. Twenty-one degrees and sunny blue skies every day. This may mark the end of it.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Summer is here.

I've stopped wearing dress clothes to work. They're too hot and whether or not I'm wearing a tie is of no consequence. The time for impressing my employers is over, anyway.

Shopping for clothes in Korea has yielded an exciting discovery: I share the exact dimensions of a tall Korean male. Young men here are definitely slimmer, by and large, and so I have been able to find khaki slacks and polo t-shirts for someone of my height and width. Not only that, but the pants were $10-15 and the shirts were $7 each. You simply can't find pants that cheaply at an equivalent store in Canada (Wal-Mart or Zellars are likely most comparable to the Lotte Mart where I was shopping), and although you might be able to find polos in a similar price range, they are tailored for the physique of the typical American Wal-Mart shopper. In such ill-fitting duds, I am left feeling like a mast on a ship wearing a sail, my slim athletic build draped in fabric meant for someone much broader. So it was quite a boon to find that though I am taller than the average Korean, I still share enough of typical Korean build to find clothing that fits me perfectly.

The last couple weeks I've been wearing my polo tees, and the students have taken notice. The average Korean, to quote the O.C., is "hairless like a seal." As a result, my forearm hair is the object of intense curiosity. While I'm helping them write their names in English, boys pet my forearm hair and say "Ohhh, very good!" and girls have bashfully stroked it and erupted in fits of giggles.

To a lesser extent, the boys have noticed that I have muscles. They fondle my triceps and give me praise similar to what I get for my ability to grow arm hair, then they ask me to flex so that they can observe my biceps. On one occasion, a boy lifted up my shirt to see my abs, and then was somewhat disappointed that I wouldn't let him capture them for posterity with a cell phone picture.

On the one hand, I appreciate the admiration for my gym efforts (although I can't say I understand being praised for hair-growing ability; I wonder, if I had tufts of back hair peeping over my collar, would they respond in the same way?). However, having my forearms petted and my muscles prodded has made me feel more like a zoo attraction than an English teacher. I'm still a sucker for flattery; the kids make me blush.

Friday, April 25, 2008

A Hilarious Journal About Korea...

We've been reading the blog of model and fellow Korea appreciator Elyse Sewell and it's yielded this hilarious discovery:


This winter these animal hats were hugely popular. I sent two home to my brother and sister, but apparently the trend had caught on in Canada too--for Christmas my sister ended up receiving a panda hat from me and a bear hat from her step-brother.

Anyway, Elyse Sewell's journal is full of funny and interesting stories of life in Korea, life as a fashion model, and life in general. I highly recommend it.

Funny Stuff

So, at the beginning of every class I pass around a beach ball, and "randomly" stop this song in order to select students for brief three sentence interviews. The kids roar with laughter when the music stops and I get a deer-in-headlights look from the young girl or boy holding the beach ball. I don't know if this would be hilarious in Canada, but it works like a charm as an icebreaker in Korea. Then, I ask, "What is your name?", "What do you like?", and say "Nice to meet you." The student knows the answer for the first question, but isn't always able to put it into a sentence. Half the time the student stumbles on the second question, maybe he half gets it and says "computer game." Often the student fails to respond to respond to the third sentence with "Nice to meet you too," despite the hounding of my co-teacher.

My favourite response to the "What do you like?" question came this week, when a cute little girl answered, "I like dog babies!" This has had Joanne and me laughing all week.

Later on, I ask the students to write "Something Special About Me." It is rare for the students to know the word 'special' so I have to explain it to them. I say:

"What is different about you? What do you like about yourself? I am special because I am very tall and I like running. Some girls say 'I am very very very very beautiful' (all the girls laugh at this), some boys say I am a 'pro-gamer' (there are Korean teenagers who make a living playing video games), some say 'I am very smart,' 'good at soccer' or 'I have nice friends.'"

Some kids balk at the question and write "I don't no" or "There is no thing special about me." But other times I get really amusing gems. I wish I could remember them all. Here are a few:

"My fat."
"I going up a tree very well."
"I have very many freckles."
"I want to be a UN Ambassador."
"I have black hair."
"I am a long hair."
"punching"
"I'm small."
"I like meets" (for their favourite food).

Today a girl came to English Town wearing a hoodie that was rather amusing. It had a smiling monkey in a tub of "Monkey Wax." Underneath it was the text, "Polish your monkey every day," "Banana Flavoured," with the footer "Give your monkey the buffing he deserves." In a different context, this would be considered lewd. But few people know anything about innuendo in Korea.

Earlier in the week, we saw a girl with a cartoon of a pig on her shirt, beside text that said "I love pig" and surrounded by multiple inscriptions of "yummy" on all sides. In Korea, people advertise food with cartoons of the food looking hungry. So pork restaurants have pigs licking their lips, cows have cows licking their lips, and little girls wear cute cartoons of animals advertising their favourite food.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

I got in!



This coming September I will begin my PhD with full funding at the University of Maryland College Park.

I wrote my MA thesis on a book by the chair of Maryland's Philosophy Department, so I am thrilled to be going there.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Family Time!

My family has finally arrived! I've been anxiously awaiting their visit, and it's been wonderful so far. Our visit started up in Seoul - where my mom ran the Seoul International Marathon. It was quite a sight, with 30,000 runners... and no spectators (see the picture of the empty street below - this was one minute before the lead runners went by). Not like anything I've ever seen before!

Maman ran a 4:08 marathon, which is especially impressive considering that she was still jet-lagged (my family arrived 38 hrs before the start of the marathon), and had spent most of the previous day on a walking tour of Seoul, including climbing Namsan Mountain (Dad's idea).

We all took the bus down to Yeosu on Sunday evening, and the fam spent the week touring the surrounding area while Alden and I worked. They covered Odongdo Island, Hyangiram Hermitage (a temple on a seaside cliff), Naganeupson (a Korean Folk Village), came for a visit to the school and managed to spend a day walking to the next town! In short, they covered pretty much everything there is to do in Yeosu.

Our next weekend outing was to Boseong, where there is a tea plantation, a beach and a 'sauna' - with various small pools, including both sea water and green tea pools. It was a very enjoyable unplanned weekend, though I think the food is starting to get to two of my family members. (Ask them about the instant noodles, fried chicken, chips, popcorn and hamburgers.... while my Dad eats bowlfuls of bibimbap and rolls of kimbap. Actually, Dad also managed the entire school lunch, which is a feat I have yet to accomplish.)

They're now exploring the volcanic mountain (Hallasan) and lava tubes on Jeju Island, the "Hawaii of Korea". I'm looking forward to hopefully seeing Jeju in May, when it'll be warm enough to go swimming.

And of course, I'm looking forward to seeing my family again when they come back to Yeosu on Friday.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Recompense

On the way home from school today we were followed by a cute little Korean boy. He said "Hello Joanne!" when he caught up to us, and then a few moments later turned and gestured toward me and said "Man friend!" with a smile. A minute later he said "Run!" and sprinted ten paces ahead before turning around to continue walking with us. We could tell that he was showing off his English vocabulary, but knowing that he was an elementary school student I knew we had almost exhausted it. After walking in silence for a little while longer, we stopped to take off our jackets. While I was putting my jacket away, Joanne continued talking to our adopted Korean boy. "I'm hot" Joanne commented, and he replied "I'm cold because I am very wiiiindy" while waving his arms above his head.

Kids like that make up for a day with students that couldn't care less about English.

Monday, March 17, 2008

A New Cultural Experience


This is considered funny in Japan and S. Korea. I do not understand why. Anal penetration is no big deal here. On the other hand, many Koreans deny that homosexuality exists in their country. I can't really make any sense of it.

I was made aware that "tong chim" is an occupational hazard of teaching in Korea before my arrival, thanks to Brandon, who provides a detailed account of the outrage of the experience here. But knowing about it and experiencing it are two very different things. I've generally been careful, standing with my back to the wall and putting my hands behind my back and over my bum when I lean over, but you only have to let your guard down once.

So on Friday a student shoved a pencil up my butt. I was distracted. There was a fistfight brewing; I was trying to get a pudgy kid not to slug a runt with glasses. I shouldn't have turned my back on the rear table of boys. They're always the worst.

This is one thing about Korea that I don't understand and never will. I don't want any part of it. I can deal with the gross food, the last minute schedule changes, and appreciate the K-logic that goes into spending $12 000 on an unused library (full of books far too difficult for any of our students to read) and refusing to pay us overtime, but I will not stand to have anything shoved up my bum.

Thankfully, it took nearly seven months for it to happen, so hopefully I will leave this silly place before another student decides to give me a free prostate exam.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Discovery

Chestnut yogurt and yam yogurt are two new delicious flavours. Mmmm!

Korea

12:57 p.m.

Olivia: Are you teach next year?
Me: Um, we do not know yet.
Olivia: No?
Me: We do not know yet.
Olivia: Ah. You must decided by 3 p.m. today.

Teachers usually decide whether or not to stay for another year about one to two months before the end of their contract. Our contract isn't up until the end of August. Uh... help?

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

About Korean Cuisine, Computer Games, and Fitness Clubs

I use the term "Korean cuisine" in conversation when talking about Korean food in the hopes that any Koreans listening will not pick up on the fact that I am talking about the challenges that come with eating it. The other day, Joanne and I were discussing the struggles we expect her family to have with the Korean cuisine once they arrive. I constructed the following dialogue to articulate what I expect will happen:

Emilie: Daaaad, stop making me eat squid.
John: Eat your squid Emmy, it's free.
Emilie: But it's dry and tastes like carpet with cat pee on it.

(Dried squid, or 'cuttlefish' is often provided for free as service in S. Korea. The kids here love it.)

I was working out at the gym yesterday, and I saw something rather strange. The weight-lifting coach came over to my new friend Songjin (he's been to America and speaks a little English) and proceeded to reach over and grope Songjin's pec for several minutes. The coach then said something to Songjin in Korean, I can only assume it was to the effect that he was congratulating Songjin on the firmness and development of his chest muscle.

Then I had a conversation with the weight-lifting coach, with Songjin as my translator.
Songjin: He wants to know if you think he's handsome.
Me: Yes, he's handsome.
Songjin: He wants to do a 'give-and-take.' He thinks you're handsome. Do you think he's handsome?
Me: Yes, he's handsome.
Songjin: He wants more than that...
Me: He's very very handsome!

The coach thought this was really funny.

In other news, I'm horrible at computer games. I'm trying to learn how to play Starcraft because it's easier than Korean and might help me more in finding a social circle.

Friday, March 7, 2008

Thailand and where I'm going next....




Here are two pictures that Joanne took of me on our trip to Thailand (more of her pictures are available here). Thailand exceeded my expectations, and I expected a lot. The food was cheap and delicious, the accommodation was inexpensive and friendly, and the travel within the country was easy and hassle-free. I had fresh mango juice for a dollar, discovered the joys of snorkeling (I saw millions of shiny neon fish and a white manta ray!), and received Thai massages that were as relaxing as they were cheap (and they were very, very cheap).

The challenges of our trips to Cambodia and the Philippines made me appreciate Thailand even more. There is less desperation for the tourist dollar in Thailand, whereas in Cambodia* and the Philippines people do not just charge a tourist price, but attempt to gouge and scam tourists for all they're worth.

I've returned from vacation three kilograms lighter, with a stomach that hasn't quite yet worked all the bugs out. It's kind of disheartening, since I've been trying to gain weight so that I can fight -81kg at judo tournaments next year. After getting up to 75kg with much diligence and effort, I have no landed firmly back in the -73kg division. Maybe I'm just not meant to weigh more than I do. I missed training a lot, and it's good to be back at it again.

*Crossing the border to Cambodia was ridiculous. Everyone tried to rip us off. We avoided one visa scam and ended up getting conned in another for $10 each by a border guard. After that we were misdirected away from a free shuttle bus to the border town's bus station to a bus that took us to a tour guiding company. After we got off the bus and made it clear that we wanted nothing to do with the scamster, he proceeded to follow us around Poi Pet for the better part of two hours, instructing everyone in Khmer not to tell us where to find the real bus station. It's hot in Cambodia and we were up at 5am to start our trip, so needless to say this was rather unpleasant. It looked like we were never going to find the bus station, and that eventually we were going to have to let the scamster have his way with us, until finally, a cab driver appeared out of nowhere and we were rescued from the awful situation

Thursday, March 6, 2008

New Name

Our English Town has been renamed. We will be replacing all signage to read "Yeosu Foreign Language Experience Centre".

Goodness.

The explanation: "We don't know the reasoning exactly."

Monday, March 3, 2008

Back in Yeosu

Today we had our second "first day back at school after the winter break". We had another one two weeks ago, but were then given a surprise extra eight days of vacation! I quickly e-mailed the travel agent with a request to look into flights to Macao, Hong Kong, Tokyo and Cebu... basically anywhere nearby that didn't require a visa. As it turned out, the cheapest option was to fly to Cebu City in The Philippines...

I definitely want to spend some time discussing The Philippines with my grand-parents. They spent a year living there (about 30 years ago), and I really wonder how things have changed. Or if they have changed. I can't imagine that things are much better than they were, considering the poverty we witnessed. There were armed guards everywhere. I would expect guards to be stationed in banks. Gas stations would be borderline. But we even had an armed guard at the entrance to our hostel. Perhaps this should have made me feel safer, but it instead had the opposite effect.

There were some beautiful sights to be seen. The snorkeling was amazing. The tarsiers were cute. The chocolate hills were impressive. The ube (a purple yam used in sweets and pastries) was delicious. And the fact that they had pastries (thanks to the Spanish influence, I believe) was superb. And mango juice. Mmmm, mango juice. It was an interesting vacation, though I wouldn't call it relaxing.

I'm happy to report that we are both glad to be back in Yeosu. The school administration is still giving us a few headaches, but our apartment is great and we have a pretty good routine going. Also, we found cheap lentils in Seoul on Sunday, which makes life so much better! Dahl and chapatis tonight for dinner, it was wonderful.

My photos of The Philippines are already up on the flickr page (the link is on the left side of the page), and I hope to get the Thailand and Cambodia pics up soon. Maybe Alden will even post a couple stories? I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Local Engrish

Plenty of funny things happen all the time here, but I thought I'd just quickly post some local Engrish.

"Glory
my favorite
animal is
bear
doll"
-on a girl's sweatshirt

"Strong team
32-K Rainbow St.
Smile town.
Zip.763810 U.S.B.D."
-on the back of a boy's coat

"Crossroads Produce"
-the name of a car (the official name given by the company)

"Cast Only"
-a warning sign on a company truck

Friday, January 4, 2008

It's starting to feel like we live here...

Thanks for the Christmas and birthday cards! It was nice to receive actual mail... I now have cards on my desk at work.

Work itself is a bit slow this week. We have been at school from 9 - 5 with the sole task of planning the upcoming English Camps. I'm working on several sessions - pop songs, "English Math Fun", arts and crafts, cooking class and a taekwondo session, among others. In case it isn't obvious, some of these sessions were prescribed. Apparently I am going to teach Korean kids taekwondo, which should be interesting. I've been going for less than three months, and there are always a couple kids in each school group that have their black/red belt. My form is... well, let's just say I'm not an expert. Ha ha... oh well! I'm sure it will be fun, or at least funny.

Over the course of the week we'll also be learning a play. Out of curiosity, would you say that most Canadian kids know the story of The Merchant of Venice? Okay, how about Canadian high school students? University students? I would venture to say that a few people may have studied it in high school or uni English classes, but beyond that? Well, I was informed today that the script of a fairy tale that Alden and I had carefully selected and modified (for simplicity of the English, number of characters, length of the play, etc.) would be dropped in favour of a narrative version of The Merchant of Venice. Narrative meaning that the script has yet to be written. The play now needs to be a "very famous" play, and apparently all Korean kids know Shakespeare intimately. This should be fun, especially since our regular kids have trouble with the English Town dialogues ("May I help you?"/"Yes, I would like that red pencil case."). The kids at our first camp will be from the islands, meaning that they will have an especially low level of English. Ha ha... cultural differences. They are starting to become apparent.

***
In other news, I had a wonderful birthday in Busan. We had sushi, watched a movie and enjoyed some champagne. That may not sound very extravagant to people back home, but trust me, it was! It was great.